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‘I have been punched, I have been kicked, I have been screamed at and spat on’

  
https://www.infirmiere-canadienne.com/blogs/ic-contenu/2024/09/16/pourquoi-jai-failli-quitter-la-pratique

Why I almost left bedside practice, and how the nursing shortage worked to my advantage

By McKenzie Tosh
September 16, 2024
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In nursing school we are taught to spend time with our patients and get to know them. Staffing shortages and mismanagement make this goal impossible. It is not uncommon for a nurse to have more than six patients on a day shift and 15 or more on a night shift.

In this paper, I will discuss my personal experiences that led me to consider leaving bedside nursing many times throughout my career. I will be discussing physical and sexual harassment in the workplace, understaffing that leads to inadequate care and burnout, being put in unsafe situations by management, and finally, how I overcame these issues, found a place where I love to work, and my recommendations for other nurses in my position.

The first time I was assaulted in my adult life was on the first day of my very first placement in nursing school. I was 19 years old and introducing myself to a patient in a long-term care home.

The patient asked me if I liked men and I said yes. She smirked and said, “I like women” and proceeded to grab my butt. I backed away and brushed it off, telling myself that the patient was just confused. Unfortunately, this was just the start of many sexual and physical assaults that would happen to me during my career.

Being a young nurse, I would often get such comments as, “Lucky me, I got the hot nurse!” I also distinctly remember a patient crying and asking me for a hug. Wanting to help, I offered the patient a hug and in return, I got my breasts groped. From that day forward, I never hugged another adult patient again.

I have been punched, I have been kicked, I have been screamed at and spat on. These experiences are not unique. I have co-workers who have had bones broken, concussions that caused them to be off work for months at a time, and PTSD from being cornered and attacked by the patients we are trying our best to care for. This was not what I signed up for.

Nursing school vs. reality

In nursing school we are taught to spend time with our patients and get to know them. Staffing shortages and mismanagement make this goal impossible. It is not uncommon for a nurse to have more than six patients on a day shift and 15 or more on a night shift.

The feeling of having all these patients’ lives in your hands and being unable to provide the care that you wish to provide because you are just one person is horrible. I beat myself up every day because I forgot to bring my patient a glass of water. Or, I took longer than I intended in getting a patient to the bathroom because with so many patients, you have to prioritize. Unfortunately, the “care” part of nursing falls to the wayside.

We want to care for our patients, but we are physically unable to be in so many places at once. The patients that are kind and understanding are rays of sunshine in our days, and they are what pushes us to keep doing what we do.

I also feel as though I’ve been bullied by management. I have been threatened with patient abandonment and loss of my nursing licence because I said I couldn’t stay after my night shift to also work the day shift because the next nurse called in sick. I have been made charge nurse on my first day after orientation on a busy surgical floor. I have felt unsafe by the number of patients I have had to take care of, and I have cried in the med room more times than I can count.

Pandemic only made things worse

I became a nurse in 2015. Almost all of these problems I have mentioned happened prior to the COVID-19 pandemic, and the pandemic has only made things worse. Many nurses were at their breaking point years ago, and the pandemic has exacerbated the problem.

However, I was able to overcome the career challenges I faced by realizing that the nursing shortage had also worked in my favour.

For years after I first became a nurse, I worked in the community with the goal of working in hospital. But now with the nursing shortage, I was able to get into specialties that weren’t available to me before. I no longer felt stuck in a job I hated or that mistreated me.

When I didn’t feel safe being the only RN on a busy surgical floor on my first day after orientation, I didn’t hesitate to submit my resignation despite my manager calling me and telling me I would never find anywhere better to work because all health-care facilities were struggling. By contrast, my very next job was a supportive and amazing place to work.

During the pandemic, nurses were made into martyrs. But there is a difference between taking pride in your work and sacrificing your own well-being for your patients and your job. I encourage all nurses who have had similar experiences to those I have described  to find their voice and tell their stories. There are places out there that will value you and your contributions to patient care.

Advice for new nurses: don’t settle, find your place

My advice to new nurses is to never feel you have to stay somewhere just for the “experience.” This will only lead to burnout and your exiting the field early. I thought about leaving nursing entirely and went so far as to apply to go back to university. I am glad and relieved that I finally found a place where I fit in.

Nurses are crying out for help, and we always have been. We can go on for only so long before our voices give out and we leave the profession feeling defeated.

I work in Ontario, where for years nurses have felt defeated by Bill 124, which capped our wages at a 1 per cent increase annually. An arbitrator ruled in favour of a higher wage increase, but the damage has already been done and it will take years for the profession to recover. We also feel defeated by management, who are unable or unwilling to support us, and by the very people we care for, who may use and abuse us.

I am one of the lucky few who were able to find a position that is supportive, that is in a specialized environment where the maximum number of patients I am allowed to care for at a time is two, and that has enough staff to support the number of patients we receive.

Unfortunately, this is not the current norm, and this is why there is a global nursing shortage.


McKenzie Tosh, RN, BScN, is a nurse at McMaster Children’s Hospital in Hamilton, Ontario.

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#bullying
#nurse-patient-relationship
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#nursing-practice
#recruitment-and-retention